Is It January Yet?

December hurts.  The reality of the last few months has really set in. 

December 2nd was the sixth anniversary of the birth of the twins.  This year was probably the hardest because for the first time I truly felt like I was the only one missing them.  That's a hard feeling to stomach.  

When I first moved to Council Bluffs ten years ago, I became friends with another reporter at work.  Her family quickly became my second family away from home.  We went to supper at least once a week together, sometimes three or four times, and I spent most evenings with them since my horse was at their house.     Two years ago, December 7th, my friend's father had a heart attack in their driveway right after returning from a family vacation.  It was so shocking and such a traumatic ordeal for my friend and her mom.  It feels like just yesterday that it happened and at the same time, it seems like forever ago.  My heart was definitely with her on Saturday.  

December 9th, 1926, one of my favorite people in the whole world was born.  I wish so much that she was still here so I could celebrate her 87th birthday with her.

This has always been one of my favorite photos.  I miss my grandma every single day.  I wish she could have met Sam.  She would have enjoyed his shenanigans and spoiled him rotten.  It's hard to believe she's been gone three years already.    

This weekend we will be saying goodbye to our family home.  Words cannot express the pain just the thought causes me.  It's like the last few tangible pieces of my dad are being ripped away, and there is nothing I can do but stand here and watch them go.

My parents' anniversary and Christmas will no doubt be a struggle as well.  I've so far managed to avoid hearing Carol of the Bells, which will make me sob, and JIF peanut butter, which was in my dad's favorite Christmas cookies.

Is it January yet?  Back to happy elf pictures ...